Food food food food food… over and over, it beats like a drum in my head! It’s not out of hunger; it’s not out of necessity; it’s out of addiction! The harder I try to ignore it, the louder and stronger it gets. I want to cry! I want to scream! I see the scale climbing up and up and up while I hope it drops and drops and drops. I try to remind myself you’ve done this before at a higher weight you can do it again! Then every night I find myself face to face with the demons that scream and chant and drone FOOOOOOOOD. I must break these chains! I must fight back! I must push myself to do what I think I need, but, in reality, I KNOW it’s kindness that I need! I need to be kind to the fact that my body has an injury and pushing like I used to isn’t going to happen. However, it doesn’t mean I need to sit here and do nothing! It means SLOW down and ENJOY life! You can’t run…. so walk SLOW and ENJOY! You want to inhale food… SLOW and ENJOY! Life isn’t about ALL or NOTHING; it’s about EVERYTHING! SLOW and ENJOY! You don’t have to be a warrior, nor do you have to be a bum. We say balance balance balance! Yes, living that balance may be the hardest thing in the world… so today I say ENJOY! Enjoy what a walk does for your body! Enjoy what a bite of cake does for your tongue! Stop trying so hard to fight! Let it go and just ENJOY!
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